Blog Post #2: Interpersonal conflict- based on a past experience

A close friend and you planned to take a language elective module together. Both of you have being good friends since secondary school days and are glad to be in the same university. The module conducts 3 tutorials weekly and has about 10 tutorial slots available for each tutorial A, B and C.

The balloting for tutorial slots starts next week. You crossed out slots that clashes with your timetable and sent her a list of timings that she can choose to fit into her schedule. 5 days passed and you had not received any reply. You sent her a SMS to remind her about it but she only got back to you the night before the balloting day. Her reply was a brief SMS indicating the 3 slots she had decided on. You checked and realized you were unable to take any of the slots with her.

You got anxious and called her immediately. She then explained that, “Oh I’m sorry, I’m so busy that I forgot to tell you that I found a friend of the same major as me who is taking this module too. Our timetables are similar so I'm taking the tutorials with her.” Hearing this, you felt betrayed that she actually planned this module with another friend without updating you.

You were left to take this module alone. You felt that she should have let you know earlier instead of you calling her up to learn about it at the last minute. She tried to ask you out as if nothing happened but you don't feel like hanging out with her for the time being.

How would you have reacted if it happened on you? Also, what do you think could be done to maintain this friendship with your close friend?

Blog Post #1: Why are effective communication skills important to me:

Effective communication is all about conveying your intended messages to people clearly and unambiguously; where the party receives them with as little distortion as possible. This process can be fraught with error such as messages muddled by the sender or misinterpretation by the recipient. Such error can cause confusion, wasted effort or even a missed opportunity. In many instances of our life, we’ll need to adopt effective communication skills be it on a causal event, a job interview or a formal meeting. Good communication can bring you closer to success both personally and professionally as you work towards your goals.

Whether one needs to communicate general day-to-day information or major changes in your organization, the best communications require some good planning. By putting yourself in the shoes of your audience, think about what do they need to hear? What is their preferred way of receiving the information? What will stop them from listening to what you have to deliver? And how will you know if they have got the messages? All these depend on the kind of situation surrounding your communications. Channels for conveying your message across can be through sms, email, letter, phone calls or face to face. It is important to structure your message and to adopt a neutral tone for a written format. While for a verbal format, it should be noted that nonverbal communication cues can affect interpersonal interactions.

In a multi-cultural country like Singapore where I’ll probably live my life working at after I graduate, I see the need to foster intercultural communication skills in addition to those general skills as mentioned above. This helps create an audience-focused communication plan where potential conflicts can be avoided.

Overall, in spite of greater importance being placed on communication skills, many individuals like me continue to struggle with the inability to communicate ideas effectively. I hope that this module can help to prepare me for my career progression as I pick up skills taught along the way.