I have a golden retriever who loves to swim. Once, when I brought him to the beach, there was a Malay family swimming in the sea. As Rover walked towards the sea, the children screamed “Anjing!” (I’ve heard it often enough to know that it means dog in Malay) and the parents quickly ushered everyone out of the water and retreated to their picnic mat.
After Rover was done swimming, we went to the nearest toilet to rinse him off. While I was doing that, a Malay cleaner scolded me for polluting the waters. Since I was done with Rover, I decided not to argue with him and left. As we were walking back, I noticed that the Malay family had gone back to swimming in the sea.
Before letting Rover into the sea, I made sure that we were as far away as possible from the Malay family. By getting out of the sea while Rover was in it and getting back in once he was out, the Malay family communicated non-verbally that they were still uncomfortable being in the same waters as Rover, even though we were very far apart. The cleaner was more direct, verging on ethnocentrism, when he accused me of polluting the waters.
I understand from my neighbour, who is Malay, that Muslims view dogs as ritually impure. Thus, they are not allowed to come into contact with bodily fluids, such as saliva, of dogs. That was why the Malay family quickly exited when they saw Rover stepping into the sea and why the cleaner was displeased with me.
That was a one-off incident though. I’ve met Malays who smile politely and let Rover and I pass before going on their way, which I’m thankful for because there are others who bounce away from me, as though there’s a monster on the other end of the leash.
Dear Siew Ting,
ReplyDeleteYour post could have been more concise when describing the issue and focus more on analysis.
Remember to spell out 'I am' and 'I have' as in your last paragraph you used the short speech forms.
I guess sensitivity and more respect for another race is very important here in Singapore. It was also good that the Malay family also practiced certain levels of tolerance by choosing not to confront you when Rover was entering the sea. I guess it is only here in Singapore that these values are heavily emphasized and placed among other 'laws'.
Regards,
weng yin
Dear Siew Ting,
ReplyDeleteIt's my first time to learn that Malay view dogs as impure. Living in multi-cultural country like Singapore, we really have to pay more attentions to cultural differences.
In my opinion, what we can do to culture difference is to accept and understand the differnce rather than try to change others' views. If conflicts occur, we had better adjust ourselves and try our best to avoid them again.
For the case in your post, although you might feel angry with the cleaner, it was correct that you didn't argue with him, because it is impossible to change others' culture.
I am personally in favor of the reaction of the Malay family. They respected your culture and needs so they didn't try to stop you or arugue with you. At the same time, they also had to repect their own culture. What they did was a "middle way" to avoid the potential conflict.
Being more accommodating may be the guidline to deal with culture difference.
Thanks for sharing.
Regards,
Yinbei
Thanks Weng Yin and YinBei!
ReplyDeletePersonally, I didn't argue with the cleaner nor the Malay family as I feel that there could be some reason that they reacted that way when they saw Rover. I am curious about the way they feel towards dogs, but since its obvious that they do not like dogs, we would just keep a distance away from them before I pry any further into the issue.
After finding out the reason behind it, I can understand that the Malays have their cultural norms that they want to stick to and I respect them for that. And thanks Yin Bei for adding that 'accommodating may be the guideline to deal with cultural difference' as this is of high importance since we all live in a multi-cultural society like Singapore.
From,
SiewTing
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
ReplyDeleteDear Siew Ting,
ReplyDeleteI have to say that I am impressed by the way you handled the situation. It was very respectful and tolerant of you since you clearly held a different set of beliefs and opinions from both the Malay family and the cleaner and yet you were accommodating and gracious.
Thanks for your post. Like Weng Yin, I felt that it could be more concise too. Also, I would have loved to hear more opinions and insights you have when you reflect on the incident.
Regards,
Shilpa
P.S. please help me delete the earlier comment! Thanks:)
Dear Siew Ting
ReplyDeleteYou didn't say whether you think you ought to avoid doing this in future as consideration for other races is still paramount in Singapore.
Moreover, there are asthmatic people who are allergic to furs. Consideration for them is also important.
Perhaps you may also want to take into account the welfare of the animals. People who have pets must be able to take care of them in terms of weather conditions, space and cost.
I am afraid in space-confined Singapore, there are only some places dedicated to animals and these may be costly. So in the end the post may not be so much a cultural conflict as a "respect for others" situation.
Do sum up and give us your final thoughts on this matter.
Regards
Happy
Hi Ms Goh
ReplyDeleteI'll try to avoid possible conflict that could arise in future by keeping a distance between Rover and the Malay families. And i would also try to keep my dog to myself at the line where we would not cause harm to any people around us.
From,
SiewTing